Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

With the sound track of "Love Actually" playing in the background, the tree trimmed, and presents ready to be wrapped, I sit here and realize my favourite day is almost here; Christmas Eve.  I'm not sure exactly why I love "Eve" instead of "Day", but I do.  I think it might stem back to when I was a kid and all the traditions that led up to that particular day.

Growing up, my parents, especially my mom, created magic and wonder around the holiday season.  It started with decorating the tree, early in Dec.  We'd buy a real tree and adorn it with all sorts of decorations from Christmas past.  An assortment of colours, shapes, and home-made trinkets, which my sister and I made over our elementary school careers.  Of course there are our favs- the ones that resemble our old neighbour boys, baby bulbs, and ancient ones my mom bought for one of her first Christmas' with my dad, when money certainly wasn't growing on trees, for .35 for the box.  Of course we'd retell the same stories year after year, and Lesly and I would hide the same "A&W" bear in the tree to bug my mom.

Then the "parcels" would arrive from "Winterpeg", from both sides of the extended family.  When my sister and I were old enough to use scissors we'd tear and rip the carefully wrapped parcels open and revel in the comforting scent of wrapping paper and cold newspaper, a strange scent, but one I'll never forget.  Pretty presents, wrapped in bright paper and squished ribbon and bows, would then be carefully placed under the tree.  Without fail, for as long as I could remember my dear aunt Joy would send two gifts exactly the same for my sister and I, purchased from Avon.  One was always an ornament and the other some small trinket.  We'd open them at the exact same time on Christmas morning.  Vinarterta (an Icelandic Christmas cake) would also be in the parcel from my Amma, which I was always eager to start eating.

Finally on Christmas Eve, we'd all get dressed in our best and head to either my dad's brother's house for an Ukrainian feast or to my mom's sister's place for a fun, cocktail  party.  Both evenings had their own lure and sparkle.  From borscht and perogies at The Freeman's to fancy cheeses and decadent dainties at the Smith/Ward's, I couldn't get enough.  Loud conversations with family members, loving verbal jabs, and usually a game or two.  Nothing compares to a night with family.  Then it was off to bed when we got home, to wait for St. Nick to come visit.

Now as an adult I'm creating my own traditions based off of the ones I fondly reminisce of.  Scott and I decorate our pre-lit tree, with ornaments both old and new, from far off places, and local treasures.  We usually drink a nice bottle of wine and eat hors d'oeuvres, playing Christmas music.  I now make Vinarterta with my mom, in the hopes to one day hand down this ancient recipe to my nieces.  This year, for the very first time, I had to mail off a parcel to my sister's family so far away.  It was filled with gifts, wrapped in brightly coloured paper, and I'm sure the ribbons and bows were squished.  When I was putting it all together I wondered if my aunts felt the same joy, I did, when they were packing their parcels for my sister and I.  I would have given anything to see my nieces little faces when they saw the package filled with gifts.  And with only a few days before the big day, I'm the one, double checking the guest list, and menu for our annual Christmas Eve dinner at our own house, with Scott's mom and a few friends.

Share with me some of your family traditions....

Unwanted Guest

Sunlight casting shadows on barren trails is an unusual sight to see in winter here on the West Coast, and today I was fortunate enough to capture it. Most days, rain sodden grass and a veil of water is what we Vancouverites are used to experiencing; it's how we live in the winter.  As a result, for people in places where sunlight is at a premium in winter months, many experience SAD (seasonal affective disorder), or more commonly known as the "winter blues".  This type of depression looms from November to April, which makes these months miserable.  The lack of sun pushes circadian rhythms out of whack, which causes problems for serotonin levels, leaving you feeling exhausted, depressed, and sometimes a bit anti-social.  For mild sufferers dealing with the host of symptoms, a few more hours outside, or a trip to a sunny destination can help. Other more serious cases may need to seek medical attention.  I classify myself closer to the milder end of the spectrum.  I may not need medication, but I do need to be mindful of my moods and really push myself out of lower ones.

The first few weeks of November are the toughest as I never really see it coming.  It's like how we never notice when it starts to get dark at 4:30 pm; it just does one day.  I like to think that maybe one year it won't show up, so I don't wait around for it.  This year has been really tough so far, and I'm not sure why.  It could be the extra stress at work, or the fact I miss my sister and her family, or my body chemistry could be changing, as well.  The biggest difference has been the crazy two week bout with insomnia that literally drove me insane.  This is certainly not a common symptom, but lack of sleep certainly doesn't help the other ones.  If you noticed something was a bit off about me in the last month well SAD was to blame.  I've noticed I am tenser, touchier and so very tired; not exactly friendly qualities.  Last Thursday it all hit like a wave.  I found myself still awake at 4:30 a.m. in tears, sitting on the couch with my faithful companion Triggs, as all I wanted to do was sleep.  After two weeks of this I knew I had to do something.  I went to the doctor and we figured out that 'the winter blues" had come for a visit and brought his bag of symptoms to share.  "Of course", I almost shouted, "SAD".  This happens every year.  He suggested a low dose of melatonin to help make me catch a few winks for this week and regular exercise to help release the 'feel good' hormones.  And I prescribed myself time under my sunlamp and to get outside when it is glorious out, like today.  Knowing what to expect makes my winter blues easier to manage.  When I feel anti-social, which is the biggest symptom of mine, I force myself to visit "comforting" friends.  Those people who really accept you.  The type of people you can sit in a room with and not feel pressure to fill the air constantly with chatter, but can appreciate a moment of silence without it being awkward.

It's in these times I am reminded of a painting entitled "Abbey In An Oak Forest" by Casper David Friedrich.    Most people perceive it as a depressing piece, but there is something in the faint light, through the broken Abbey window that sets a sense of peace inside of me. I have always loved this haunting picture as to me it's sad and lovely at the same time.  Long ago, in  my collage days, I wrote a short story about this painting for my Art History class called "Where Are My Monks?".  I've always thought the grave stones in the forefront were tiny monks coming to visit the abandoned Abbey.  I still see it that way.  To me, I'm the Abbey and my friends and family are my monks.  That's how I get through the winter blues, trying to surround myself with people I love.  When I retire, I plan to live somewhere warn and sunny, so the blues can't visit, but my monks can always come by and stay for awhile.

Last Women Standing

Friends come in all forms.  I have acquaintance friends, some really close friends, and life long friends; all of which either have children or really want them.  But I have come to the realization that with the exception of one friend in Calgary, I do not have a single friend who feels the same way about not having children.  This came to me the other day when I opened an email from a dear friend of mine who recently had a baby.  It was an invite to a "Welcome to the World" party to meet the new love of her life, her daughter. Of course I am happy for her, as any friend would be but it is a bittersweet situation for me, as I am losing another friend to motherhood.  It sounds dramatic, like she broke up with me, but it is true.  Especially with this particular friend, as she was my only "child- free Allie" for so long.  It was only up until last year that she taped into her true desire to be a mother; before then she had the same mind set as I do- no kids.  And together over the years, we watched as all of our other girlfriends have children.  Together attending "ladies- nights", her and I would drink our wine and nod along with the labour stories and breastfeeding anecdotes, our other friends told.

Now out of my close circle of five, I am the last woman standing.  It was only five years ago that all six of us were with Martini glasses in hand regaling over the men in our lives and the goals for our careers.  Then one by one, they all started having babies, as majority of women do in their thirties, except for J and myself.  We embraced this situation by having dinner parties with just us four: J and T, Scott and I, every month.  It was lovely.  When we did have an odd "ladies-night" we stuck together during the "baby talk", and I never noticed that we were the odd ones out.

This past August, the last time we were all together, with a very pregnant J, I became aware that I was not just the minority in the group, but the only one who didn't have children.  Sure enough, once you get a room full of people who have a major interest or lifestyle in common the whole conversation gets pulled in that direction.  It happens with everyone, not just mothers-people who have dogs; people who are in the same profession; or love the same sports team, are all guilty of it.  So instead of drinking wine and talking about travel or men, they were sipping sparkling water and debating the latest parenting theory: Attachment Parenting.  And there I was sitting on the edge of the couch, literally looking in, like a bystander, trying to keep up.  I knew then that what we all had five years ago was gone.  And I miss those times.

 It doesn't mean I still don't love them or that we aren't friends, it just means our friendships have shifted so drastically that it is hard to recognize them.  Maybe one day things will return to some normalcy, but until then I'm trying to meet some new people to hang with, but finding a child-free woman by choice, in her mid-thirties is nearly impossible to find.  It sure would be nice to have at least one Allie with me, because "one is the loneliest number".

Fall Family Time

With the crisp scent of falling leaves comes many cravings this time of year, from steaming bowls of soup, walks through leaf littered trails, to cozy sweaters.  For me this Autumn I had a strange craving that I was able to satisfy in the past few weekends; this craving being FAMILY TIME.  I believe this craving stems from my sister moving so very far away.  When she moved I felt a very strong urge to spend more time with my family, especially my parents.  So in order to indulge in this craving I booked some one on one face time with my parents.

My first date was a movie with my dad.  On a warm Friday night my dad and I walked to the theatre to take in Trouble With the Curve, starring Clint Eastwood.  This was a special night, not because I was actually seeing a movie in theatre, which is a rare occurrence, but because I got to spend time alone with my dad.  Growing up I didn't form a close bond with my him for a few reasons- he worked super long days providing for his family, I used to be painfully shy and my dad is a quiet man, so these factors led to many awkward moments trying to maintain conversation.  I knew he loved me and I him, but when it came to small talk it was difficult.  However one activity we did do together was going to the movies.  This low risk activity, since you don't need to make a lot of conversation in order to spend time together, proved to be good for us.  The last one I remember seeing solely with him was Never Ending Story.    So now that I am an adult, my dad and I have built a closer relationship but we still don't have many opportunities to do things alone. So I thought it would be fitting to start nourishing our relationship again with an old favourite, a movie.  It was a great night and I hope to do it again soon.

The second date happened the same weekend as the movie, but this time it was with my mom.  I spend a lot of time with her, so it wasn't odd to go out for brunch, nor did I think it was going to be memorable day with her. But,  boy was I wrong.  On the Sunday my mom and I ventured down town to meet my two aunts for brunch.  This seemingly fun event proved to be enjoyable but also a test of patience.  We decided to take the Skytrain, which was nearly impossible to get to, as we had to navigate through Surrey trying to find a street that wasn't closed for the marathon that was happening.   Then after getting on to the train we were told to get off the train as it wasn't working.  About 45 mins late and completely frustrated, we finally met my aunts at this fancy restaurant in Vancouver.  After we got our mimosas and food order in, conversations flew fast, from the Madonna concert the previous night to family and work issues.  The food, though lovely, wasn't my highlight.  It was the simple fact that I got to witness the easy interactions between three close sisters who don't see one another very often.  One of my aunts lives in Winnipeg, and the other lives way on the opposite side of the Fraser Valley from us, so time together is rare.  With lots of laughs and a long goodbye we promised to see one another soon.  and my mom and I found ourselves heading back to Langley.  Our train ride was filled with plans for Thanksgiving and Christmas.  I don't think I'll forget it any time soon.

The trip to the lake on Thanksgiving the following weekend proved to be a glorious time.  Scott and I, with Triggs in tow, met my parents up at the family cabin for three days of family fun.  This was the first year as far as I could remember not being with my sister and her family, so it was a little strange being just the four of us.  But that didn't take away from having a large dinner with our lake family.  This family is comprised of mostly my parent's life long friends, they met over 40 years ago in Calgary.  We see them every year up at Shuswap, and yes their children, who are my age, are my friends too.  So on this weekend we ate turkey, drank sage wine and had a few adventures.  My mom and I encountered a pack of dogs on a stroll, which forced us to change our plans to see our friends' place for a quick visit.  Scott and my dad spent time bonding over their similar trucks, which promoted a photo shoot with the red GMCs.  Golf and late nights were among the other things that filled our time.

My last big family event happened this past weekend, with my sister and her lovely family in Drayton Valley, Alberta.  She moved there in the summer with her husband and her two little girls.  This life changing event was difficult on all of us, but especially her, as she had to start a new life in a small town.  So since I was missing my best friend I figured she was missing me, and I booked a ticket to the small oil town.  I had to see this great place that has captured my sister's heart, making her say "I love my small town life."  Well after a ridiculous flight to Edmonton and a long drive to DV, I couldn't wait to see it first hand.  In the light of day I figured it out fast why they love it.  They live in a cute, well established neighborhood, where it is common to walk everywhere and know everyone.  Their house is warm and inviting and I loved my stay with them.  I spent my time reading books and art time with two year old Emry, or Shadow as I dubbed her, as she was glued to my side.  An epic dance party filled time with Tyla, who has moves like Jaggar.  I got to see the entire town and had a good lunch at Mitches.  And I loved staying up late with my sister, both nights, catching up on the latest gossip and being silly.  My brother-in-law kept me laughing with his stories and I forgot how funny he is.  Now I'm back home I miss them so much.  I hope to see them again soon.

So I guess I'm full of family now.  Tell me how you spend time with your loved ones.

The Trucks

Lunch with Tyla

Art time with Emry

Baby Not

Even before Scott and I tied the knot people have been asking the age old question "So when are you having kids?"  And since that is what mainstream society is doing at our age, it is a normal assumption to think we are.  So we always calmly answer, "We aren't."  After our reply it is rare to hear the question, "Why?"  Instead most people react by saying such things as "oh you'll change your minds", or "don't worry in a few years you'll be pregnant, and having a baby will be the best thing you can do for your marriage."  But hardly does anyone one ask "why?"  It has been my perception that people don't want to know the real reasons as they have already decided them for themselves, and would rather preach about parenthood trying to convert us.  I suspect that a lot of people, excluding my close friends and family, think Scott and I are selfish people, who hate children.  Or that we made this decision as one would choose a bottle of wine or what to eat for dinner.  All of these perceptions are false about us and are for many childfree couples.  For Scott and I, we both love children.  How could I not? I chose teaching as a profession.  We also have two nieces whom we love dearly.  When they lived close by we saw them on a regular basis.

As for making the decision not to be parents, well that took almost a year to decide.  In my early twenty's I will admit that I assumed I'd bear children.  It is what you do as a woman.  At times I think society makes us believe that you aren't a woman unless you give birth to a baby.  So in my first marriage I went along with a lot of social conventions.   Though when that union ended sans bambino, I wasn't sad.  Instead I felt liberated.  When I met Scott we talked about the baby issue almost everyday for a year, going back and forth should we or shouldn't we.  The end result for us was that we didn't want children.  They didn't fit into our life goals.  And the only reasons I could think of to have one were- buying adorable clothes, and fitting in with my circle of friends who were baby bound.  To which, my wise sister informed me that I could buy cute clothes for my nieces and friends' children, and that having a baby to fit in was a bad idea.  She understood that I had no desire for motherhood.  Now don't get me wrong, people who truly feel this burning need to reproduce should have them.  Those are the people who make fine parents.  But all too often there are couples who think a baby is an easy fix for a failing marriage, and of course you have people who are irresponsible and end up having one and later resenting the child.  Those like my "fitting in" theory are bad reasons.

So for those of you who do not know why I don't want a child of my own, I thought I'd give you my top 3 reasons.

1. My Career
As a full time secondary school teacher I come into contact with approx 120 teenagers daily in my classroom.  I think teenagers are awesome and I give 100% of my attention and patience to them.  By the end of the day I am done.  Not only have I taught them, I have parented many, counselled a handful and refereed a few, so by the time I get home I barely have enough energy to give to my loving husband and dog, let alone myself.  I am marvelled by my colleagues who can successfully do both-be a teacher and a parent.  I find I don't have enough in me to be both at the capacity as I'd want to.  So for me, it is clear that I shouldn't.

2. My Passion and Desire
I love spending time with Scott, just the two of us.  We have a great time just relaxing and talking or going on hikes ect.  And from what I have heard and observed, children don't leave you a lot of time with just your partner, which can be a strain on a marriage.  Both having done it before we know marriage isn't easy, so we have chosen to give ourselves the best shot by taking away some stress.  And please don't tell me a baby brings you closer, maybe emotionally, but not physically.

And then there is the other passion in my life: writing.  As I'm trying to complete my first novel, while working full time, it is difficult to find time to write now.  I can't imagine where I'd find the time to fulfill my inherit desire to write with children running around.  As some women having this aching need to have a baby; I feel the same about writing.  It makes me feel whole.

3. Environment
Our planet is quickly becoming over populated, as modern medicine progresses so does the population.  People are living longer and we aren't slowing down in the reproduction end of the spectrum either, therefore more people with less resources to go around.  So it would be irresponsible for me to have a child when I don't have that strong urge to procreate.  Again, I think people who have the urge to have children should satisfy this need.

So next time you meet a person who doesn't want children, instead of telling them they will regret it, just simply ask why with an open mind.  You might be surprised at what you will learn.

Cork and Keg Night Out

Last Friday night Scott and I got all dressed up with a few friends and headed "down town", not Vancouver but down town Langley for the Fraser Valley Cork and Keg-Wine and Beer Festival.  This type of event is something I have wanted to attend for a while, but somehow never got around to going.  Usually when I see the adverts for events in Langley and beyond, I immediately say to myself "yeah I'd love to go", and then I never follow through with buying tickets or I come up with an excuse as to why we shouldn't go.  But this time I decided to just do it.  So with our hot tickets in hand we entered the convention room at the Cascades Casino, and took it all in.  There were over a dozen vendors with plenty of samples to feed and water the large forming crowd.  It had been a long time since Scott and I had been out on a date, besides our usual dinner out, once a month, to the usual places.  So I was overjoyed to share this experience with him.  It felt like when we first started dating four years ago, going out to fabulous places and trying new things.  Our friends who came with us, also had a great time.  What made it so easy was that we could split up in various combinations and satisfy all of our cravings.  The boys took off for a while sampling the local breweries, tasting light summer blondes to dark ales.  Us girls took to sampling wines, starting with a local vineyard Neck of the Woods and their Nosey Neighbor blend, which we thought was appropriate considering how close we are. All four of us ate these "perfect bites" that the local, "non-chain" joints were cooking up for us.  Deep fried pickles and turkey sliders from Town Hall Langley to decadent cheese from Keso Cheese and cupcakes from Frosting to satisfy our sweet tooth.  Scott tried oysters for the first time from 1 Fish 2 Fish, our local fish monger.  As the evening wore on Scott and I, with lightness in our feet, got into the wine tasting groove that we had on our honeymoon.  So many light Pinot Noirs, and Cab blends from BC to Australia to try that we couldn't keep track.  By the time we were back out in the night air, waiting for our cab to drive us home, I realized a few things.  One- it is too easy to fall into the comfortable routine of just staying home and watching TV, night after night.  And although our hectic schedules during the week leave us feeling too exhausted to do much more than just sit on the couch, it doesn't mean our weekends should be the same.  So I want to try to go to an event or do an activity at least once a month as a reminder that Scott and I are a married couple with a pretty open and flexible schedule, so we should take advantage of it.  I also learned that the Fraser Valley and especially Langley has lots to offer and we need to support our local businesses as much as we can.  So who is up for a local wine tour this Fall?  Or a trip out to eat oysters at "The Fat Cow and Oyster Bar"?

Reflections On A Summer That Used to Be

The scent of crisp leaves hangs slightly in the late afternoon air, which can only mean that summer is almost on the way out. With this realization I reflect back on what can be described as my best summer yet, and gone are my days of pure leisure.  Since I am a school teacher I am one of the fortunate few to have an entire 8 weeks off in a row.  For some teachers this can be a daunting idea with entertaining "wee-ones" all day or just trying to stay busy.  However, I never have these problems as I'm child free, and I find I stay pretty busy with everyday things.  I have the luxury of only having to worry about myself and I can indulge in what I like call "The Summer of Margo"  This summer's focus was writing, health, spending time with people who I love and care about and who do the same for me.  And it was a success!  Here are some of my favourite moments:

Top 10 summer moments. (no particular order)

1. Berry Picking with my niece Tyla and my mom.  This day was fantastic-ripe raspberries and strawberries and super sunny.

2. My wedding at Rockwater. So magical

3. Last Date Day with Tyla; swimming, lunch at Whitespot and hula-hoop contests.

4. Sitting in my backyard reminiscing with my sister, after a garden dinner, as her daughters- Tyla and Emry ran around with their uncle Scott.

Church and State Winery

5. Delicious hours of writing my novel "It's Like Holding a Marble In My Mouth" in the backyard

6. Tasting delectable wines with Scott on our 8 hour wine tour in Oliver BC, with this rad couple from Calgary.  How perfect: two child free couples spending the day tasting wine and dishing about travel, while admiring the breathtaking views. 

7.Road trip Honeymoon in BC

8.Wonderful "girl's nights", with some fabulous women.

9.Sharing a bottle of wine with my sister on a random Tuesday night.  Staying up late and having one of our special chats right before she moved away.  Missing my best friend Lesly like she was my left arm and someone ripped it off.

 

10.Finishing the two year renovations on the exterior of the house.  Thanks again to the gang that helped out over the years.

There you have it folks.  My summer started off with a great bang at a friend's wedding in July and is now winding down with 'old school' hot tub nights with my BW peeps.

Tell me about your Top 10 Summer Moments

Hotel on our Honeymoon

Dog Days Of Summer

With the slight crispness in the air, I realize that my 8 weeks off are coming to an end.  My outside writing time and watching my dog Triggs enjoy the hot heat are slowly fading away as "the dog days of summer" are just about over.  Almost everyday this season, I spent time working on my novel in my outdoor office, while my furry baby spent his time chasing bees and sleeping on the outdoor furniture.  I know I'm not the best at discipline, but who can blame me, Triggs, our six year old, German Short Haired Pointer, is so cute when he basks in the sun, making his coat soft like velvet.

Next week when I go back to teaching teenagers the value of writing and reading, Triggs will spend his days sleeping (all day) in or on his various favourite locations in the house.  You may find him snuggled on the couch, in his crate, or on one of his three dog beds.  Yes I said 3 dog beds.  So, when someone says "it is a dog's life" they were right.  Especially if the dog has a life like Triggs.  Over the past two years, Triggs has become a major part of our lives, and ultimately our 'baby'.  Just as people can gush about their wee ones, I can talk about Triggs all day and tell you all sorts of "cute" stories, but I won't.  Well not today :)  But I will tell you about how Triggs bounded into our lives and turned it upside down.

We adopted Triggs from a rescue organization based in North Vancouver called Dogwood Rescue Society. Check them out http://www.dogwoodrescue.org or follow them on Twitter: @DogwoodRescueSociety.  I will go into more detail about this amazing organization and our adoption experience in a future post, and explain why rescued dogs are the best.

Anyways, we met Triggs on a dark Feb evening.  He had just been rescued from a kill shelter in Utah and just arrived in town.  He bounded through our front door, with his foster mom, and sniffed everything. When I knelt down beside him he literally sat on my lap.  This overweight, GSP looked me in the eyes and I knew I loved him.  Being overweight and having kennel scars on his legs (they are still there today), we knew he wasn't an important member of a family and we knew we could make him a VIFB (very important furry baby) in ours.  The night we actually got to take this anxious dog home, was the night of the opening ceremonies for the 2010 Winter Olympics.  I remember taking turns with Scott, laying beside Triggs on his dog bed, trying to make him feel at ease.  After hours we gave up and sat on the couch, and that is when Triggs invited himself up with us and peacefully layed on top of Scott and I.  If we stopped him right away, I'm sure he wouldn't have become a lap dog.  But I have admit I enjoy his warm body next to mine on the couch.

Over the next last two years, with many warmed hearted moments and some challenging times, he has more than settled in.  He is well pampered and spoiled.  With comfortable places to rest his head, and a huge backyard to explore, he is living "the dog dream".  He has many adventures in the trails and fields behind out house, as Scott and I take him out once or twice a day for exercise.  He comes along with us to the lake, where he learned how to swim last year.  This year he will go hunting with Scott as his is a natural hunter.

So there you have it.  I may not have a human baby to brag about, but I sure do love to brag about my furry baby.  And I know there are some of you who share the same feelings as I do about your pet, even with kids in tow.  So tell me about it.

Living In a Little Piece of Heaven

Just as the warm cedar air descends through the late afternoon, so does the cacophonous hustle and bustle of my fair neighbourhood of BW (Brookswood).  If you are unfamiliar with this suburban area, the best way to describe would be a well established community, filled with 1970's houses on large lots, lined with towering pines, firs and cedars.  It reminds me of North Vancouver but less polished.  On any given weekend, especially when the weather is sunny, the inhabitants of BW are busy landscaping, accomplishing renovations, washing trucks and walking their dogs with their families.  Another normal sight is neighbours helping one another out.  For instance, last winter when we actually had snow, a neighbour plowed the street with his truck.  And next weekend, Scott and our best friends, who happen to be our neighbours, are going to put on a new roof.  From taking off dead limps from trees to putting down sod the residents here work hard.  However, once the day falls away to dusk, we all play harder.

When we first moved in four summers ago we didn't know how fortunate we were to live in this neighbourhood, not to mention in this exact location.  We quickly found out about our awesome peeps that live next door and just behind us, in what we call the "inner circle".  They came to our house warming party and were literally the last to leave. I thought to myself they know how to have fun.  And after getting to know each other it was very apparent that the six of us, or crew, knew exactly how to have fun every week.  It has become the norm for all of us to hang out almost every weekend, either Friday or Saturday, sitting in the hot tub or by the camp fire, until the wee hours of the morning.  We do this so often that we built a gate between the fences so our yards are connected.  Most people find it strange or odd that we are so close with our neighbours, especially since there is a little age gap.  But for us, we don't see it.  It has never been an issue.  All that matters to us is that we have great laughs and experience all that comes along with life together. Together, we have rallied for one another when one of us needs some extra support.  Our peeps were the ones to stick close by to us when Scott had his surgery earlier this year.  They brought food, came for visits and even mowed our lawn.  And over the years, Scott and I have returned the love and support to all of them. Spending time together is easy and spontaneous, since their teenagers are almost self sufficient, so they don't need to find sitters in order to go out.  This bods well for Scott and I as the rest of our social circle is filled with couples with babies and toddlers, and it is so difficult to get a night out without the kids in tow.

So last night around the camp fire we all fantasied about winning the big lottery.  And I kept thinking what if we did win?  Would we all stay in BW or move to newer, larger homes?  I have to say, I hope we either find three houses in a row for sale, or just continue living here, with upgrades.  I can't imagine what will happen when one of us decides to move away.  It will be the end of era that's for sure.  Scott and I have no plans on ever leaving BW, but our friends here have teenagers, and eventually they will be empty- nesters, which could mean they may down size.  But with the rate of kids living at home until their late twenties is on the rise, we may luck out :)

So in honour of BW, we are having a big "Deep Fry" and then attending the block party down the way tonight.  It should be a blast!

What is great about your neighbourhood?  Tell me, I'd love to hear about it.

Did You Hear The Waves Crash On Our Wedding Day

I figured for my first post I'd tell you the story of how I met my husband Scott and how we got married in July.

It all started in Oct 2008, when my sister invited me to a Halloween party at her house.  Dressed as a pirate I was ready for an adventurous evening.  Little did I know I'd meet my 'prince', or should I say 'mechanic' as that was Scott's costume.  Long story short, we spent the whole night talking and hit it off.  However, due to phone issues and his crazy work schedule, I didn't hear from Scott until three weeks later.  And when I did, I was anxious to see him again.  Our first date was average to say the least, but our second date, or as we refer to it "The Epic Date", sealed the deal for me.  We spent over 12 hours together and by the end I knew I didn't want to let him get away.  He was funny, interesting and just genuinely a great person.  I quickly realized that he was the type of man I'd been looking for; one who could take charge of a situation and never back down from a challenge.  He works hard and embodies strong characteristics, like loyalty, integrity, and ambition.  A real lust for life so to speak.

Time flew by quickly.  In that time we got down to discussing the "Big" questions, as we both didn't want to waste time with one another if we didn't agree on the big 3: Kids, Money, Lifestyle.  We had both been married before, and now knew exactly what we wanted in a partner and a relationship.  I was elated to find out that Scott agreed with me about living the good life in a little house, in a good neighbourhood, without kids.  We both want to travel and focus our energies on our careers and with one another, and not be distracted by children.  I had figured if I really wanted them I would have that burning desire you should have when you have children.  It wasn't in me.  Scott agreed that although it's nice to see kids from time to time, we didn't need any of our own.

It didn't take long before we got engaged, Spring of 2011 in Sechelt BC.  And from our previous experiences with weddings we both knew we did not want the large family wedding, where most time the 'wants' of the couple gets pushed aside by the 'wants' of the families.  We elected to have a dream destination adult only wedding, inviting our friends and family to come along with us.  After careful deliberation we chose a beach wedding in Jamaica as the perfect place to tie the knot.  However, majority of our friends or family members were unable to make a commitment to attend for various understandable reasons, so we had to cancel that version.

Both Scott and I were extremely disappointed, but we got over it and decided to elope.  Not being overly keen on getting married completely alone, we opted to do it our way, and invited six of our closest friends to help celebrate our special day with us in Halfmoon Bay BC, at the Rockwater Secretcove Resort.

I can still hear the waves crashing on the shore below from our tent -house suite deck, where Scott and I exchanged personal vows to one another.  The intimate ceremony was magical as I felt truly blessed to have our friends surround us with their love and support for Scott and I.  We actually pulled off a breathtaking, stress free wedding, with no family drama.  We had our destination dream wedding, just a bit different than we expected.  Isn't that always the way in life?  It never really is what you expect, but the reality sometimes surpasses the dream.

Tell me about your wedding experience.  Would you do it again the same way or try something different?