Fanning the Flames of Marriage

As I sit in the backyard garden, sipping the last of the crisp Pinot Grigio, the night air ripples along my bare arms, creating a tingling sensation in my body.  The stars are out, husband is sleeping and I'm left satisfied with the memory of our dinner date we had only hours ago.  I made a simple grilled prawn salad with garlic and Parmesan toast points, paired with a chilled Pinot Grigio for dinner.  Outside I arranged an intimate table with a table cloth and candles, and Scott and I enjoyed each other's company for a quiet evening at home.  Between our work schedules and our active social life, we find it hard to maintain romance through out the week.  But by July 1st when I'm on summer break and the nights are long it seems to be easier to squeeze in some alone time.  Summer is the season when we can turn off the TV and tune into one another, and I find just planning a few simple, inexpensive dates does the trick to fan the flames of our marriage.

Last year I made the effort to plan and prepare a picnic once a week.  A different location and menu for each week, and as a result we had at least one meal together undisturbed by cellphones or other distractions around the house.  For Scott and I, just being alone, focusing on each other through conversation seems to bring us closer, which sparks an intimacy we can carry into the bedroom.  So participating in the dating ritual, like when we first ignited the flame between us, works every time.  However, now that we are married and have been together awhile, date nights don't seem to be top priority as they used to be- real life rears its ugly head in.  Not to mention going out for elaborate dinners every week can add up fast.

So here are my favorite picks for summer date nights that add heat but don't squash the bank account.

1. Dinner for two, outside.  I love our backyard and I'm a good cook, so I can whip up a nice meal, add some ambiance as mentioned in the beginning of the post, and bam we've got 'date night. No reservations needed.

2. If you have a deck and/or a fire pit available, post dinner drinks and s'mores or strawberries dipped in chocolate are a great way to catch up on the day, and maybe the sticky marsh mellows or chocolate will lead to something special.

3. Picnics for lunch or dinner.  Choose a park, make some simple food- even a baguette, cheese and grapes, with a well disguised bottle of wine can be a lovely meal for two.  Bring a blanket and fun game to play to work up an appetite, before or after the meal.

4. Enjoying fish and chips literally on the beach: order a two -piece with fries to share, sitting on a blanket in the sand.  And then grab cold ice cream cones afterwards and stroll along the beach to watch the sunset.

5. Patios are now open and Happy Hour now on most menus, so you can eat, drink and be merry.  Find a picturesque location to enjoy the libations and you will probably enjoy much more.

6. Go on a wine tasting.  Most wineries have free tastings or the fee is waved when you purchase a bottle.  And let's be honest who doesn't end up buying a bottle before they leave.  Lots of local wineries allow you to bring your own food for picnics.  And Backyard Winery in South Langley is open late Friday and Saturday nights.  Pop in for a tasting or a glass and let the magic of the wine do the rest.

7. Create a playlist of your relationship soundtrack, and dance the night away in your backyard or just reminisce when and where you two first heard that song together.  What makes that song important to you?

8. Too hot to sleep upstairs, then pull your mattress downstairs where it is cool.  Set up a movie night of romantic comedies and see where the night takes you.

If you have any fun and affordable ways to keep weekly date nights alive, then tell me about them.