Another Step On My Writing Journey

Last Friday I was surrounded by a community of writers at the Surrey International Writers' Conference held at the Guildford Sheraton.  Never in my life have I felt like I truly belonged in a large crowd until now.  When I've attended conferences in the past I'd always felt uneasy, awkward and out of place.  This time, with the exception of one volunteer, I didn't know a soul, and yet I felt a part of this amazing tapestry of writers.

For a writer this is an odd feeling as so much of what we do is in isolation.  Most writers are private about their writing until they think they have something worth sharing, and as a result they write alone with no connection to others.  I'm no exception.  Besides my blog I keep my writing close to my heart, only allowing a select few in to read.  I've been working on my novel since the summer of 08, but no one really knew about it until 2010.  I think the secrecy behind my novel has more to do with me.  Up until last week I'd always felt strange explaining what the novel was about to people I know.  I'm not sure why.  It might be the fact I'm my own worst critic and think the content isn't engaging enough. Now after two pitches and countless conversations with other writers about my project I feel a bit more confident about it.  I'm guessing if an editor wants to see my first three chapters when the whole manuscript is ready then I have something worthy to share.

Yes that's right, an editor wants to see my writing!  It is still shocking and I don't want to get too excited about it; this is only the first step to getting published.  Just because they want to see something doesn't mean they'll like it.  I feel honoured just being asked as it has been a long and strange journey with my novel thus far.

When I started writing this 200 page manuscript one summer night in Shuswap my intention was just to write a short story.  This 5 page story inspired the novel.  From there I wrote my first draft, which has been transformed many times over.  Each new version surpassing the former in skill and technique.  Just when I think I've mastered it my dear editor Alyssa always comes back pushing my limits again toward achieving success.  Alyssa is not an editor by trade; she is a friend from work who has graciously been reading my novel for the past few years.  We get together from time to time to discuss my characters and plot, brain storming ideas on how to make it better.  What I love about Alyssa is that she tells it to me straight; I appreciate that as I'm sure any publisher, agent, or editor who reads my work will be just as tough, if not tougher.

So right before the summer I actually read my novel from the beginning to the end in one shot.  Up until then I had only read it in chunks and just "fixed" them.  Well my immediate reaction was to delete the 101,247 word document as I hated it.  In my eyes there were so many holes in the story- the protagonist seemed flat and I finally understood what Alyssa meant when she said that she didn't understand why the protagonist loved who she does.   I felt defeated; almost five years of hard work and nothing to really show for it.  Luckily I got advice from a fellow writer who told me to take a break and come back to it later.  I did just that.  I took three weeks off and then up at Shuswap I found my muse again.  Then I spent the rest of my summer revamping and reorganizing my novel.  I even changed my title; Marbles and Wine rolls off the tongue better than Its Like Holding A Marble In My Mouth. What a mouthful, ha ha. Pun intended.

I know I still have more revising to do, but after listening to accomplished authors last week about their first novels I realize that it takes time and not to worry.  Writing is a process and it takes time to prefect it.